Wishing for a Better Start

My usual disclaimer: Long entry... but minus the cursing this time :)

Holy Mother of God.

Last week was a VERY tiring week for me, to the very point that I caught the sniffles. Because my lack of rest had apparently affected my immune system. Thus the fact that my allergies caught on and POOF: A whole week of wet hankies and wasted tissues in the bin.

Gah... gross...

I can say that I'm better than my condition last week. But then I just wish that my throat can recover from its raspiness and that my slight coughing would bid sayonara soon.

Our music presentation is THREE DAYS FROM NOW!! ...and If I could, I would... cry. Because of the fact that my group has the potential to improve but has no will to practice. But of course, I wouldnt cry. Because I keep thinking of how much of a damned bunch of people they are. Sigh... but I have to remind myself that a lot of them mean well.

But disregarding the looooooooong week... I had the chance to kick back a bit last Friday. haha! The HP movie wasnt all that bad, but considering that I watched transformers the week before, I can't say that I enjoyed it as much.

The last bit of that day was a time in the arcade. Woot! I wish I placed more than a hundred bucks on my card though. I wasnt prepared for the day. However I will reach up to the last level!!! You just wait ya hear??!!

Then last Saturday was my long awaited BREAK... and disregarding the fact that I had review classes (which wasnt much of a review because I wasnt really listening haha!! shhh.). And all I did was stay on my bed and laze around when I got home... hahaha. I thought I deserved it.

But lo and behold. >>>http://www.tabulas.com/~yatch32. That's our Academic Chairman's blog and it contains the stuff we have to do for the week. I HAVE SO MUCH WORK TO DO!!! *sniff*

and gar..

This day has been a reflection of a broken promise to myself when the year started. Despite the long days from the previous week, despite all the stress I've given myself, you have no idea how LOW my performance in class has been. I've failed about 2 quizzes (one of them being math..sniff...I miss geom) already because of my inability to control my priorities. And it makes me sick to my stomach knowing that I have to give up a lot of things just to perform better in class... it's a saddening thought but nothing happens if you just wait for the miracle instead of finding it.

~~~

Gah... the atmosphere in my class is utterly depressing. Though I've grown to form friendships in there, it's no III-3. And this thought just builds up everyday. And I wont doubt that it's affecting my performance as well. Let's not include that I'm reciting more. It's just that... the interest to learn is basically lost when I enter that classroom. The effort just vanishes in my very being. I'm becoming lazy and that fact's just disgusting.

I know it's a good thing to be lazy once in a while. But when you abuse the thought of that act being "once in a while" and not noticing that it has become "more often", then you're in trouble...

All I can say is... I have to step up. I just HAVE TO.

~~~

I can feel that Senior year will be a drag (inside the classroom at least). And wow... perfect timing. My mom just yelled at me about how the UPCAT's near by.

haha. Nice mom....(sarcasm)

Anywho... But dont worry.. I dont mean to bring anyone down because of all these damned thoughts. ^^ I'm just glad I'm updating today and that I hope I can change my total slump from last week :).

Au revoir! ;p

Being stupid is what I should stop doing... XP *smacks self*